Riverlands, the meandering

First, and always foremost, I have to thank those who have contributed to getting me to the start line. My wife, Sarah, will always be #1 in this spot. For every mile, hour, or day I am out on the trail training or racing she is at home keeping things in order and being there for our children. I couldn’t do any of this without her. To Scout, Squirrel, and Joker – to always have you three in my corner with words of wisdom, encouragement or a big old HtFU kick in the pants is beyond words. To my coach, Matt Urbanksi, to have you on my side pushing me in training, sharing your vast experience, and helping me reach my goals, thank you. I know that I pay you, but this training cycle has been one of the best I have had as long as I can remember and not just physically, mentally too. To my close running friends, you know who you are, Thank you for all of your words of encouragement, analyzing race strategies and being there with me either on the trails or pushing me in your own way. Finally, but certainly not least a big THANK YOU to all Trail Monsters and ALL the volunteers at Riverlands, you are all rock stars.

My journey and training to toe the start line of the the Riverlands 100 miler is a story much like a long slow meandering stream. I first heard about the race during its first running in 2017. Sarah knew a 100 was on my bucket list and she found it and I became intrigued. At the time I was just starting to get into Ultra running and was about to do my first 50K. The idea of running a 100 was still daunting and I decided I would work my way up to the 100. In 2018, I did my first 50 miler and that’s when I really started to realize a 100 was in the books. 2019, brought on a self made 100k and a couple more self made 50 milers in training for my first Barkley Fall Classic. It took me two years to get off the lottery for that race and my focus was there. I also started getting involved heavily in Trail Monsters (hosts of Riverlands) in 2019, instead of staying on the outskirts like I had. I kept hearing all about the magic of Riverlands and I knew that in early October 2019 that my year for my first 100 would be 2020! Registration was set and I started thinking how I could put my training plan together.

Well, we all know how 2020 went, and what I did instead. If you want to know more on that check out my other blog posts. In November of 2020, I decided to enlist a running coach, Matt Urbanksi, into my corner because I had run a 50 miler out at Riverlands that year and that along with many months of higher mileage overall left me injured. I didn’t want to repeat those mistakes and wanted to set myself up to be as successful as I could. After all 2021 Riverlands would finally be my year and failure was not an option.

With 100 mile training technically having started in January of 2020, I wasn’t all that excited to continue training. I just wanted to be there and run it finally; however, Coach Matt brought some “new” training techniques that I haven’t done since high school (short sprints and hill repeats). My body responded to this training very well, and for the first time in a long time (by long I mean decades) I was going into a race injury free, feeling fit, strong, and ready.

Race day was approaching fast, it wasn’t getting cancelled, and it was time to make my desire to run Riverlands a reality. I made my drop bag/gear list, talked too many hours about technique for the race with my coach, ultra friends and just about anyone who’d listen, and suffered from the typical week before taper tantrums. It was ultimately decided that I would go out slow, try and not tear down my body, take it easy for 75 miles then give it all I had for the last. By time 6 AM Saturday, May 8th, 2021 rolled in and I was feeling ready. I even managed to sleep the night before, which I am still beside myself that I actually did.

Finally, after all this time I was at the starting line, on my designated socially distanced red X l, at what I expected to be the most magical race ever. This was going to be like Disney World by the way my Trail Monster friends always talk about it. (side note, I don’t like Disney, but that is because I would much rather be on a mountain, but you get the idea, most magical place on earth). There are very few things that meet up to our expectations of what an event will be, but I have say Riverlands met all mine right from the start. I am both sad and happy to say that I doubt I will have another 100 mile race that will feel like this race did for me. Except perhaps another Riverlands, hmmmm, 2023??. (I have plans for next year, MonKat, if you know then you know. )

With our wonderful Race director, Scout, giving off final instructions we hit the trail at 6 AM sharp. It didn’t take me long to band together with a group of new friends, and let the party begin. Most of the first 6 1/2 miles is rooty and rocky single track, but it didn’t bother us. We were loud and we were boisterous. We joked, laughed, gagged (thank you Back Patrick who was in the front), counted our stumbles/trips, and talked about all kinds of things and enjoyed much of the early miles together. So to Kylee, The Professor, The Hippie, Front Patrick, and Back Patrick, thank you for making those early miles so much fun. It was a privilege to have shared those miles with you and I am sorry that we didn’t all cross the finish line, but most of us did.

Much of my early miles were focused on not going out too hard, but in reality I was just having fun, I didn’t really pay attention to my pace. (Reflecting afterwards, an average heat rate of over 160 bpm for the first 40 miles suggests that perhaps I did go too hard, but Coach Matt disagrees, because I wasn’t physically wrecked by that point) I reached the first aid station, Middle Earth, in what seemed like no time and a quick check of water and calories told me I didn’t need to stop. I called out my number to the bib/time checker and burned through. Headed to one of the biggest climb of the route, Bradford Hill. The other being Ledges that you descend down to Middle Earth after the first long sections of single tracks, but you have to climb back up it after Middle Earth on the return.

Most of my merry band of cohorts stayed together through the aid station and after a few miles of ATV trail we trudged up the last single track hill, Bradford. The race director made the decision that on the decent she would leave one tree in the way to either hurdle or roll under, hurdle being the obvious decision. Sadly, I made the commitment to hurdle the tree the other 3 loops, a choice that would haunt me on the last lap. Not long after you reconnect to the ATV trail for the last fun filled miles of rocky rolling hills and one small stream crossing (mario crossing) to the 12 1/2 mile turn around point and the Conant Road Aid station.

Reaching Conant road for the first time felt great, and I once again still had my steady supply of calories (spring gels and bars, etc) and decided to fill up my nearly empty bottle despite still having a nearly full one. I turned this aid station as quickly as filling up my bottle and away I went. This is where we lost a couple of members of our group (The Hippie and Kylee, but The professor and Patrick’s were still staying strong). I was also leap frogging with two other Trail Monsters, Craig and Sam, with Billy strong on our heels.

It was also at this aid station that I realize that I was actually having a magical time. I had expected to know a lot of people but to have someone at every aid station, or other runners out on the course that you consider a good friend, made it all feel like a big old family reunion. It didn’t take the entire race for me to realize I really was at the most magical place on earth.

Much of the 12 1/2 miles back to the start/finish to finish the first 25 miles was uneventful. Lots of joyous greetings and settling in with the Patricks and the Professor. Still having a good time, still smiling, and mostly joking about how we were going too fast. Ripping through the return Middle Earth aid station with nothing more then a water fill up. We came into the start/finish aid station in sub 5 hours. I told myself that is fine and I can take the second lap in 6 hours. still keeping an hour in the bank if I wanted to sub 24 hours.

The first entry back to the start/finish aid station was awesome. So much exciting energy, I can really see how people get pulled into hanging out. I stayed focused, I was mentally prepared for this. A quick apply of foot lube, my feet are one of the top assets out here, a restock of the calories I like, quick fill up of bottles and away I go in under 5 mins. I once again find myself with The Patrick’s and The Professor at some point between the start/finish and Middle Earth. I had left Sam and Craig back at the aid station, but they would be back with me by the end of this lap.

Much of the second lap was was also uneventful still smiling, feeling good, no major issues developing. I did a quick water fill up at Middle Earth, both bottles! It was amazing to recognize the difference between drinking the first lap and second lap in the heat of the day. I probably drank a liter of water my entire first lap and I just drank nearly a liter from the start/finish to Middle Earth. After the Bradford hill climb, hurdling #2, and a jump like Mario, I was once again back at the Conant turnaround feeling great. I think this is the first time I grabbed food from the aid station, filled up both bottles again and away I went. I was back at Middle Earth, barely stopping and heading up the climb of Ledges. The Patricks, and the The professor hot on my heels up the climb.

All three of them would catch up to me and pass me in the section down from Ledges, along the trail called Deer path. It was time to visit the woods for longer then a quick urination, thankfully, this would be my only #2 stop of the event, but not only did the Rat Pack catch me but so would Sam, Craig and Kylee who I hadn’t seen besides in turn around passing since the first Conant Road aid station. I quickly did my business and caught back up to Sam and Craig, passing Kylee and The Professor along the way. Sadly, neither of them would finish and I am not sure how far they made it but I don’t recall seeing them again or if I did it was dark and with the headlamps I didn’t know it was them. I also would never catch back up to The Patricks. Both finished strong and well ahead of me, thanks for the nearly 50 miles of fun boys! I finished lap number two with the dynamic duo of Sam and Craig and I really felt great coming into the 50 mile marker in just under 11 hours.

I know that I felt a lot better coming in this 50 miles then I had a year ago and that was a good sign. The start/finish energy was once again compelling, but I stayed focused and did much the same routine as my first lap out of here and under 5 mins I was back on the course, but this time I had my pacer, Brent, with me. I had told him to keep a group run like pace with a goal of bring us in around 6 hours. This third lap would turn out to be my hardest. Right from the start I was moving too slow to finish this lap in my designated time. I wasn’t even particularly tired physically or mentally. Nothing was seriously wrong. My mid back was starting to hurt from all the haunching over and probably too many hours of poor running form, but nothing that should have slowed me down. This is where my running really became the theme of my Riverlands, and really what had been its theme for such a long time, the meander- a winding course and lazy movement. I just kind of shuffled along, still enjoying myself, still with a smile, but severely unmotivated to go faster. I can tell you that I told Brent several times, ” I can go faster, but I don’t want to”. To Brent’s credit he made several attempts to change my course, but I was unconvinced. I meandered back up Deer path, down ledges, through Middle Earth, back up Bradford hill, over tree, and mario jump #3 without much of a care. Everything became “I will run this faster last lap. I will do that quicker next time”. I don’t know if this is a mid-100 slump, but both Brent and myself lacked the mental technique to pull me out of it. Something about knowing that I was going to finish, and I would literally walk the rest of it and still finish allowed me to do just that. This lap would take me nearly 7-hours and it wouldn’t even be my slowest lap.

The slowest lap award goes to final lap of the race and lets give it up for my just under 9 hour lap #4. (standing ovation, crowd goes wild). Yes, it was dark, and yes, I needed a better headlamp, but once again motivation to go faster was my nemesis. Before even starting the lap I spent nearly 20-25 mins hanging out at the start/finish area. Talking, eating, just in general having a good time. It was Joker who finally pointed out that I was starting to shiver and that I really needed to move my ass. So once again a resupply, lube of feet, and away I went. Alone into the dark, with parting word to Billy who had just come in to catch up to me. Brent had decided that he didn’t have the mental stamina for another 25 miles in the dark at a slow pace, and I don’t blame him. He had only promised me one lap anyway.

I would spend most of the entire first half of this lap alone by myself listening to owls, coyotes, and other critters of the night. I would run into the occasional passerby coming in for their 3rd lap, or at the top of Ledges running into the pair of runners who would ultimately tie for first place, 12 miles and many hours ahead of me, however, those greetings were short lived. I would get to see Joker again at Middle Earth, and he along with several other people said that I looked better this lap then I had the entire race. Weird to hear, and I have since been assured it just wasn’t trail talk to keep me going. I actually did feel perfectly fine, and did feel like I had more gas in the tank, I just still didn’t care. I took a bit longer at this Middle Earth aid station stop then I had before, nothing excessive, but I actually felt a pang of motivation and actually start doing what I would consider running from Middle Earth and up my last trip up Bradford hill and then to the friggin tree. The tree that I had hurdled three other times and where my final ascent over turned into a “oh shit that’s not happening, what the fuck was I thinking. Yup, I am just going to sit on this stupid tree…okay, how long are you going to sit on this stupid tree for? maybe Billy isn’t far behind and can push me off?”. Luckily, I managed to motivate myself off the tree and continue on but I had been reduced to a shuffle again. My motivation once again sapped.

I meandered through these rocky rolling hill miles best I could mostly alone in the dead of night. Still not feeling overly tired physically or mentally, just kind of perpetually moving forward. It was in these miles that I ran into the dynamic duo about 45 mins ahead of me and The Hippie not far behind them. I don’t even know when The Hippie passed me but oh well, good for him. I am pretty sure he finished. This was just before the Mario crossing which sadly someone had bridged with a pallet by the last lap. I didn’t have the motivation to move the pallet, nor would I have been able to jump over the stream this time, but I certainly would’ve gone through it. So I shamefully used said pallet, and climbed the final hills and down the last turn to see the sparkling glow of my final visit to the Conant road aid station.

It was here I made a final race decision, I could either continue to run alone and attempt to catch up to Craig and Sam. None of us were moving particularly fast at this stage and I if I burned through this aid station and they took a little extra time at their last Middle Earth, I would probably make up 45 mins on them easy enough. Or….or….or, I would just wait for Billy here, get a blanket, rest by the fire, drink some hot soup, and we all know what direction this went in. About 25 mins later, Billy rolls in with a very tired pacer and I take off telling Billy that I am just going to shuffle along until he catches up. His pacer dropped off at Conant, and Billy ran to catch me before the aid station was even out of sight. Little did either Billy or I know that months ago he and I would made an agreement that if we were around 27-28 hours, not reaching out goal times, that we would finish together, that in fact we could be doing just that in just about that time frame.

It was nice to have someone to talk to again, and I mostly set the final pace for us for the last 12 miles. Slow, but strong and steady. The sun came up, head lamps were put away, we watched the sunrise over glimpses of the river, and we reached our last Middle Earth before either of us knew it. I sat down for a final rest at Middle Earth, but Billy burned through it not wanting to stop long. That was all the motivation I needed, and I said my good by to all my friends at this final aid station, and climbed up ledges to catch back up to Billy before he got to the top. Turns out this would be my fastest climb of ledges of all 4 trips.( Huh, interesting.) By this time with the sun up, and I was actually feeling motivated again, but Billy and I had our pace and that would be it. Billy and I would cross the finish line together in 26 hrs 56 mins and it was wonderful to finish with a friend by my side.

Ultimately, I ended Riverlands with a smile on my face and a satisfactions in my heart that I made the best decisions I could in the moments. Could I have gone faster, sure I could have. I really don’t think a 21-23 hour Riverlands is out of reach for my abilities. I can do a couple easy fixes to help improve my performance in the future: a better head lamp, light that baby up like a Christmas tree, and grab my poles at 50 miles instead of 75 miles. As soon as I had those in my hands, and keeping me more upright my mid back pain went away. Some of the other changes I need to make are tougher and will take time to process. One is knowing how and when to push, in the words of Coach Matt “the crux of being your best as an ultra runner is getting this right”. It is a hard thing to get right and I don’t think I necessarily got it wrong, I just don’t think I dared to find out what my limits were in this regard yet. After all if I pushed at the wrong time, I could have blown up and not finished the race. I was comfortable being comfortable, and that is okay.

I am writing this post a week out of the race, and I have bounced back well. The brain fog has lifted, the parts are feeling as the should, and I am feeling ready to hit the trails again. I have some valuable lessons to walk away with and I have a lighter step knowing that for the second time in my life, I had the honor and privilege to share the trail with so many others who have, will, or tried to finish a 100. I may associate my Riverlands with a meandering, but I meandered through the happiest place on earth.